Going to Wales is impossible.

You’re going to go to Wales.

But this seems impossible.

Be ready. It may happen sooner than you think.

My heart isn’t ready…

If you only knew what was coming…

God still has your promises; it’s okay.

He’s teaching you bravery.

I just don’t understand…

A resource for future travelers: internship week two

The week of August 29 started out relatively well. I had a lot more peace and was beginning to see ways that God was already fulfilling specific promises. As an internship assignment I was asked to write the details of my experience and put together some information and resources for future interns/travelers to help them to be more prepared for international travel than I had been. I enjoyed the project, but by the time I completed it on Thursday of that week I began to feel that getting back to Wales was truly impossible; there were just too many things that could go wrong again. That evening at life group some people prayed for me and confirmed that God was still saying that He was going to take me to Wales, but I was having trouble believing it.

Coming to the end of myself

On Sunday morning I decided to wear a dress to church that I had bought specifically to take to Wales. During worship someone asked me if I would like to meet Greg Lee, who together with his wife Erin were supposed to be my internship supervisors this semester in Wales. I didn’t know he was going to be here, but said yes, I would love to meet him! But as soon as I did I began to cry…here I was, wearing a dress I had hoped to be wearing in Wales, meeting the man whose family I had planned to be living with right now, but yet I was still in the States. What happened to all of God’s promises?

When we finished our brief conversation I went into the bathroom and cried for a long time, finally truly grieving the loss of my dream, confused and disappointed. I wasn’t angry, but was still so full of questions, uncertainty, and discouragement. Eventually two people came in and prayed with me, one of whom as she prayed said she saw me standing by a river that was flowing away from me, and felt like the Lord was saying, “Be strong; stand firm.” I was blessed and encouraged by their prayers, though a little confused about what God meant by the river.

Desperate for God to speak

Tuesday morning I went to chapel at school and during worship I sat in the back, frustrated. God hadn’t given me a “plan B.” If I had been wrong about the timing of the trip to Wales, I wanted to know. If I wasn’t supposed to go yet, then I needed to pursue other internship options immediately in order not to lose a whole semester. I needed clarity on my next practical step; I needed Him to speak today.

After chapel I called a mentor who encouraged me to spend some time praying and listening for the Lord to speak. She reminded me of the time that the Israelites were entering the Promised Land but how God had to intervene and part the Jordan River. After I finished the phone call I began walking, praying and listening. Almost immediately I heard in my mind, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous; do not be dismayed, do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.” I recognized the verse as Joshua 1:9, but the wording in my ESV Bible was a bit different so I went online to look up the NIV version. When I pulled up Bible Gateway Joshua 1:9 was the verse on the website! I was so encouraged.

Later that day I read more of Joshua 1. In verse three the Lord told Joshua that He was giving him every place where the sole of his foot would tread. What struck me was the fact that before I left on my first attempt to get to Wales a lady had prayed that same verse over me. The Lord also reminded me of Isaiah 55:11, that God’s word does not return to Him empty but will accomplish His purpose. A friend had reminded me of this verse before I left the first time. By the time I went to bed Tuesday night I had trouble falling asleep because I was so excited; the Lord was restoring my hope again. I had realized that if I was going to do this wholeheartedly, then the only way to know for sure whether or not it was the wrong timing was to try again.

More confirmation

On Wednesday I was sharing all of this with a couple of people, and as I was talking about the book of Joshua and the Jordan River I suddenly remembered the lady who prayed for me on Sunday, how she had said she saw me standing by a river. Finally the river theme was making sense; God was about to make a way where there seemed to be no way. And by the end of the day I was informed that there was no further opportunity for me to fulfill any internship requirements locally; my only option now was to go to Wales.

Awaiting the green light

So now I am waiting once more, but this time all I need is the green light for a specific travel date from the people in Wales. The Lord is making the way, and I am ready to be there, ready for this time of testing and lesson to be completed, and ready to continue my adventure on the other side of the world!