It seems to be a pattern in my relationship with God that He often moves me very quickly into new adventures. My natural personality is to plan everything in order to be as prepared as possible, but when God steps in and the timing is right, everything seems to fall into place. Here are some personal examples:

– Finding out about (and signing up for) a short-term mission trip to the Dominican Republic approximately eight weeks prior to the departure date
– Hearing about FIRE School of Ministry for the first time and moving from Minnesota to North Carolina exactly seven weeks later
– Getting the final green light from God to make my second attempt to get to Wales and flying there three days later
– Receiving a phone call from my dad offering me work in Minnesota for seven weeks and flying home five days later

The next step

“Lord, if you want me to move back to Minnesota after I finish school, You will need to make it very clear…”

I prayed the above prayer multiple times during my last three years in North Carolina. I honestly couldn’t imagine going back home after the adventure I was experiencing away. I had incredible encounters with God’s presence, was learning to hear the Holy Spirit’s voice so clearly, experiencing deep fellowship with believers my own age, and so many other things. There were a few times when I even begged God not to send me back, fearing I would lose the intimacy I had discovered in my relationship with Him if I were to return to a place that was so familiar.

Within the first two weeks of my last visit to Minnesota in August/September, I attended a family reunion with my parents. While there my dad offered me a more permanent full time job. As he was explaining what it would entail, I was somewhat confused by the sense of peace I had, because in my mind I was thinking, “I don’t want to do this. This can’t be God. This could never work.” I had just moved in with a new family in North Carolina; how could God really be asking me to leave so soon?

Honest with God

Later that evening as I headed back to our cabin, I was frustrated and even somewhat angry that God would give me peace about this. I was afraid of losing Him, and of not hearing His voice as clearly. I began to pray very honestly…”God, I won’t come back here if You are not with me…why would I choose to leave the very place where You have spoken to me so much and so often? I feel like it would be leaving the fertile soil and river behind in order to make camp in the desert…” When I climbed into bed moments later, I “randomly” turned in my Bible to Isaiah 55:8-13:

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. For as the rain and the snow come down from heaven and do not return there but water the earth, making it bring forth and sprout, giving seed to the sower and bread to the eater, so shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose, and shall succeed in the thing for which I sent it. For you shall go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall break forth into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands. Instead of the thorn shall come up the cypress; instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle; and it shall make a name for the LORD, an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.”

I was blown away…God was speaking and already confirming this move. I remembered being asked by someone last July how I would know what I was supposed to do next, and my reply was that I wasn’t sure how I would know, except that I was pretty sure that I would know when the time was right. I had told God a long time ago that I was willing to go wherever He sent me. I believe He had waited until the timing was just right; if He had told me any earlier, I probably would not have received it or believed it was really Him.

A wrestling season

Despite my growing certainty that this was indeed the Lord’s plan for me, I spent most of my remaining weeks in Minnesota wrestling with God and, in a way, grieving the loss of my friends, community, and church family in North Carolina. As I shared the process I was going through with a few people in Minnesota, more than one of them said they believed I had already made the decision to move and was just trying to deal with and process the implications. I still couldn’t bring myself to speak of the move as reality, but only as a hypothetical situation, as I made tentative plans related to the new job, as well as the details of the move itself.

When I got back to North Carolina on September 21st after being in Minnesota for seven weeks, it wasn’t quite the same. It didn’t feel like home in the same way it used to, and I didn’t have the same peace that I had before. As the days progressed it became apparent that a shift had already taken place. God had already gone ahead of me to prepare the way for my transition. Even the family I was living with sensed that something was different about me when I returned, before I told them anything about what the Lord had been speaking.

After spending over two months speaking in the hypothetical, I finally had the courage to admit the truth and began to share it with others. I believe that on that August day when the work opportunity was presented to me I had probably decided in my heart to go for it, because I knew it was God; it just took some time before I was able to admit it publicly. However, once I had made the decision public, I began to have some excitement and anticipation about the transition. After all, if this is God’s plan and He is good, then I believe that whatever happens next will be good, even if it is difficult and challenging at times.

One step at a time

Thus continues my adventure of following Jesus one step at a time. I do not know a lot of details about this transition yet, except simply that I am supposed to move home on November 1st and begin working full time for my dad. But I believe that God is indeed sending me to Minnesota, and I know He will be faithful to show me the next step when the time is right.